With springtime flower gardens beginning to bloom, I’m reminded that every married person is something of a gardener. You may have a garden (marriage) that’s overrun by weeds, but nevertheless, you are a gardener. Every good gardener knows that intentional and wise care must be given consistently to your garden, or it will not thrive.
I just wrapped up a series, “Rekindling and Reclaiming Sex in Marriage” that was my effort to help you pull out the weeds, as well as plant good seeds in your marriage garden. When you are committed to these ongoing practices, you probably will be able to relate to one of King Solomon’s romantic invitations …
“Come, my love, let us go out to the fields and spend the night among the wildflowers. Let us get up early and go to the vineyards to see if the grapevines have budded, if the blossoms have opened, and if the pomegranates have bloomed. There I will give you my love.” ~Song of Songs 7:11-12 (NLT)
But today I want to move from the internal world of our own hearts toward cultivating a deeper love in our mates’ hearts through some creative and romantic gift ideas. I’ll be using the Bible verse below as the basis for my inspiration.
“Be completely humble and gentle; be patient, bearing with one another in love.” Eph. 4:2 (Emphasis mine)
4 Springboards for Giving to Your Mate
1. Humbleness
Who doesn’t love a humble spouse? I know every time my hubby comes to me with a humble attitude, it melts my heart in a flash! It’s both endearing and attractive! So here are some gift ideas that spring from a humble heart.
Gift #1 – An Apology or Confession
The next time you mess up, whether unintentionally or in an insignificant way, apologize. It can be the best gift ever, especially after a conflict or hurtful offense.
What does a good apology sound like?
It is spoken with humility about what you specifically did wrong, validates your mate’s feelings and takes responsibility for your future choices.
[bctt tweet=”Find out what a good apology in marriage includes. These ingredients really matter! #humbleapology” username=”BethSteffaniak”]
For example, if you said something critical about your mate in front of others you could offer an apology like the one below. Click on the image to download it from Dropbox at the “…”
Gift #2 – “Humble Pie”
I’m including several pie recipes that could be offered up as a tangible and tasty gift of “humble pie” to your mate. 😉 That’s a gift my hubby loves … both humility and PIE! Click on the links below to grab the PDF of the recipes!
Lemon Meringue Pie (my hubby’s favorite)
2. Gentleness
Gift #3 – Gentle Tone
The next time your spouse or kids irritate you, use a gentle tone to respond. If you’re prone to a quick temper, this can be really hard. So one way to remind yourself of this is to write out James 1:19-20 on an index card or print out the graphic I’ve included below. Click on the image below to download from Dropbox at the “…”
Then keep this card handy—pulling it out whenever you’re tempted to “not be gentle.”
Gift #4 – Give your Mate a Massage
This can be done over clothes or without clothes. If you go the route of without clothes, consider massaging with almond or coconut oil. You can also use these as carrier oils for essential oils, but I would suggest being careful about how you do this. Your spouse might be allergic to some essential oils. Besides, not all essential oils are created equal!
If you have questions, you can contact my friend Stacey, who is an essential oil representative and specialist at: oilystacey@yahoo.com. And if you’re in the area of Edwardsville, IL on Saturday morning, April 14, 2018, she’s hosting a free oils class at the Comfort Inn from 10 till noon. Enter the password “healthy” at this link to find out more details and to register.
Whatever way you go about giving your mate a massage, the key here is to be affectionate and gentle.
3. Patience
Gift #5 – Unhurried Quality Time
- You could take your spouse on a date to a place he/she has been impatiently waiting and wanting to go to. Or …
- Maybe you could take your spouse shopping, then wait patiently for him or her to browse for as long as they would like. Or …
- Offer to go on a leisurely walk with your mate to scout out the best flower gardens—remembering you’re a gardener of your own marriage. 😉
The possibilities are really endless here!
[bctt tweet=”Be a gardener of your marriage by giving your mate the gift of unhurried quality time. Come by for more gift ideas! #8gifts” username=”BethSteffaniak”]
4. Love
Gift #6 – A Jar Full of “What I Love About You!”
I did this years ago and need to repeat it so that my husband gets an updated peek into my heart today. All you do here is write out on small, colorful pieces of paper all the many ways that you love your spouse. Thinking through these many ways will not only encourage your mate, but will encourage you as well.
Here’s one that I could add to my husband’s jar … “I love how you are so compassionate with those who are brokenhearted and grieving.”
Gift #7 – A Jar Full of Hershey’s Kisses and Hugs
Everyone knows what a Hershey’s kiss is, but did you know that they also make hugs? These candies have a swirl of milk chocolate and white chocolate combined into one foil-wrapped morsel.
How about, every time your mate eats one of these kisses, you lean over and give your spouse an actual kiss on the lips? Don’t forget to give your mate a hug when a “hug” is the candy of choice. This can be a fun little exercise and sweet treat enjoyed during foreplay as well.
Gift #8 – A Date to Get a “Love You Latte”
If your mate is a coffee lover, what better way to show your love to him or her than to take your sweetheart out for what you affectionately refer to as a “love you latte”? You could even go to a café that makes those fancy latte’s with the hearts swirled on top of the foam. How romantic is that?
Bottom line:
Your marriage garden is only as fruitful, beautiful and sweet as you, the gardener, make it. I hope you’ll pick at least one of these gifts to give to your mate soon, so that you can encourage your mate’s love to come into full bloom this spring and beyond.
Which of the gifts mentioned sounds the most intriguing to you?
What are some gifts you’ve given your mate in the past that have helped love bloom in your marriage?
I’d love it if you’d hop over to thrivingmarriages.com to read an article of mine that was originally shared and published at Homeword.com, “What To Do When Your Spouse is a Perfectionist.“
Here are some lovely linkups I join – Inspire Me Monday, Literary Musing Mondays, Dream Together Linkup, Jennifer Dukes Lee, Glimpses Linkup, Break Through Homeschooling Linkup, Coffee for Your Heart, Sitting Among Friends, Grace and Truth, Grace Moments Linkup, Tune in Thursday, Moments of Hope, Faith and Friends, Fresh Market Friday, and DanceWithJesusFriday
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